Big Red Tomato

He's got an admirer. She's a notorious widow, a blond of a certain age with a propensity for pinching fresh meat. Most of the younger male staff know to avoid her, or at least not have their backs to her lest they be goosed flagrantly.

At the start of the summer she donated a bag of pots of young tomato plant seedlings. I ignored them, he ignored them. I gave in and potted them on. We lost a few but enough survived. We have about twenty five tomato plants. Big, strong green tomato plants, bearing big green fruit. Green.

Thank god my mother left me a receipe for Green Tomato Chutney. What a shame I can't remember where I put it.

In the mean time he's mentioned to her that our fruit are the Wrong Colour. She's making a donation of some of her surplus Big Red Ones. How caring. Wish she'd take him by way of a trade.