Eventful afternoon shift

Today we had a plump pasty faced young (uniformed) security guard on duty but only until 8:00pm.

He had been asked to focus his efforts on the side entrance / exit which is the way the trolley loads of goods have been removed recently. In theory the doors are one way except for staff but most astute customers and all thieves know how to override the door and get it to open from the inside.

So quite what he was doing mooching about round the other side is a bit of a mystery. Then he went AWOL. We'd been having a hell on afternoon. Scales failing on the express checkouts were one thing, staff being granted leave at short notice we couldn't afford to have them take by people who should know better were something else. We had card 'issues', products mis-pricing and pretty much everything else you could imagine. My supervisor was on a checkout when a kid fell over and cut her leg.

While I'm trying to calm the girl we hear that a notorious piece of scum has come into the store. I leave the girl to the first aider hoping to get at the thief but I'm distracted by an underage operator needing my to supervise an alcohol sale. While I'm at his till waiting to deal with the next customer, who also wants alcohol, I spot my suspect at 3 o'clock. He's standing in front of the cheap vodka, holding his shirt collar up to hide his face and only making himself more conspicuous in the process.

As I watched he plucked a bottle from the shelf and walked very briskly down the length of the aisle. At the end he turned right and doubled back down the next aisle which happens to be what we call Health and Beauty (though the latter is a bit of a joke). As he got round the corner he started to push the bottle up under his jumper.

In the heat of the matter I either said "Oi, you've got to be joking!" or possibly "Oi, you've got to be fucking joking!". Either way I roared it with as much muscle as I could summon. He dumped the bottle in one of the display bins and legged it down the aisle with me in hot pursuit roaring at him to Get Out Now.

We left scattered and astonished customers in our wake. He vaulted one of the checkout barriers, I watched him leave with dignity (or more than I'd have been left with if I'd attempted to vault the barrier). Astonished staff wanted to know if I was alright but I was absolutely fun. Top notch in fact. Then I saw our lumbered security guard lumber in from a break outside.

Things were not quite over as the little shit bag had apparently taken off his shirt before attempting to re-enter the staff via the side entrance. That meant me jogging up and down the aisles making sure he had not in fact got back in. He hadn't. And he hadn't got his booze either. As long as he wasn't a decoy having me run about while someone else got away with the real target.